QWK KCKS: ‘Arry ‘As An ‘Appy Day

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Written By Chris Azzopardi

QWK KCKS is our way of helping you get your day started with a refreshing blast of football culture right in your face.

 

PHOTO: IT’S HARRY, AND HE’S HAPPY. HOORAY? HUZZAH?
Harry Redknapp didn’t dodge taxes by using his dog’s name to hide Monaco money that he was saving to buy a really nice suit once he’s named England manager because Fabio Capello won’t last the Euros. I think that’s right, anyway. (REUTERS)

 

FUN WITH PHOTOSHOP, FAMOUS CLINTS AND THAT ATROCIOUS MICHAEL JACKSON STATUE.
The Clint Dempsey Guardian gallery, which you might not have seen. NWA. Yeah. // The Guardian

 

PLEASE MAKE SURE EVERYONE IS STANDING EXACTLY WHERE THEY WERE STANDING BEFORE.
Catania-Roma will pick up exactly as it left off when the original game from January 14th was abandoned due to a soggy pitch. Cool. // The Footy Blog

 

WHERE THEY GET PAID.
A map of the clubs of all of the AFCON goalscorers so far. Hey, that guy plays in China! // The Best Eleven

 

PHOTO: TURTLENECK AND…NO CHAIN?
Hey look, it’s Pep! (REUTERS)

 

WE DON’T HAVE TOO MANY LEGENDS AROUND HERE, SO EXCUSE US WHILE WE TAKE A MINUTE TO HONOR ONE.
American soccer legend Harry Keough, a member of the 1950 World Cup team that shocked England, died at the age of 84. RIP Harry. // Soccer By Ives

 

WHY WOULD YOU WISH TO DEPRIVE US OF JOSE IN ENGLAND? WHY, MAN, WHY?
Premier League teams should pass on bringing Jose Mourinho back to England says a guy who is probably right but very much resembles a wet blanket right about now. // When Saturday Comes

 

THIS IS NOT A FAIR TRADE. DO YOU KNOW HOW FAR I LIVE FROM WORK?
If Leo Messi wears a Real Madrid jersey for a day, Spain might break out in civil war. Not really what the World Wildlife Fund has in mind, I imagine. // Invent Football

 

PHOTO: SEMIFINAL END.
Third division side Mirandes came up short against Villareal Athletic Bilbao (oops) in their Copa del Rey semifinal, ending a magical run for their fans. (GETTY IMAGES)

 

KINDA GOOD, KINDA CHEAP, FIFA IN A NUTSHELL.
FIFA is giving money to the families of the victims of Egypt’s football violence. A total of $250,000, or about $3500 a family. $250 grand is .0004 percent of the profits FIFA made between 2007 and 2010. // Dirty Tackle

 

POKE. POKE. POKEPOKEPOKEPOKE.
Here’s a list of deluded fan bases, which you probably don’t know the one you belong to is a part of because you’re deluded. So it will be a nice surprise perhaps. // Bleacher Report

 

‘ELLO. ‘OW ABOUT A ‘EAPING ‘ELPING OF ‘ALIBUT?
Writing like that is addictive. I might need a 12-step program. Follow us, like us, try not to hold the apostrophe-A in the place of “H” thing against us. I admit I’m helpless, and that’s the first step. Also, people should pronounce their “H’s”, and then I wouldn’t ‘ave a problem. Crap.

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