QWK KCKS: Attack of the Gas-Pumping Goalkeepers

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Written By Chris Azzopardi

QWK KCKS is our way of helping you get your day started with a refreshing blast of football culture right in your face.

 

PHOTO: MARCELO, INVERTED.
Marcelo flips out over his goal against Mexico. See what I did there? Yeaaaaaahhhh. (REUTERS)

 

OH, THE HUMANITY.
A step-by-step guide with how to process Liverpool’s decision to go it alone on a television contract. It doesn’t end well. // Surreal Football

 

LET US MARK THIS MOMENTOUS OCCASION BY FÊTING HUGO CHAVEZ. OR NOT.
Venezuela did something they’d never done before last night, while Argentina didn’t so something usually did before. // Dirty Tackle

 

FINALLY, A COFFEE TABLE BOOK CHARLIE SHEEN WOULD BE PROUD TO OWN.
CR7′s girl Irina Shayk is all kinds of busy these days, gracing the pages of a book called Culo and appearing in digital form in a video game for some reason. // Kickette

 

PHOTO: WALTER PONCE’S BUNDLE OF JOY.
Chile’s Walter Ponce celebrates a goal against Peru with the “the ball is a baby I am pregnant with” gag. Kiss the baby. (REUTERS)

 

THE WIDER THE GOAL, THE SWEETER THE JUICE. THAT’S NOT RIGHT…
An illustrated guide to the rules of pick up begins with field dimensions. // The Other 87

 

YOUR BUSINESS IS OUR BUSINESS, JACKY BOY.
Shocking news flash of the day!!!!!!!! Jack Warner told Caribbean delegates they should accept bribes and vote for Bin Hamman, and someone recorded him saying it. // The Telegraph

 

I’M INTERRUPTING THIS LINK POST FOR SOMETHING SHAMELESS. SUE ME.
I do an American soccer podcast. Also, it’s a vodcast (hate that word). Next live edition is tonight at 9:30 EDT. Check it out. // The Best Soccer Show

 

PHOTO: GARETH BALE CREEPS ME OUT.
Goal celebrations are about love. And desperately wanting Gareth Bale to put his tongue back in his mouth. *shudder* (REUTERS)

 

THERE’S ONE CLERK IN LIVERPOOL THAT THINKS PEPE REINA IS BATSHIT INSANE. I’M WITH YOU, BROTHER.
Pepe Reina decided it was a good idea to tell the world about his crazy pre-game rituals, which clearly indicate that he has a serious case of OCD. // Off the Post

 

RICH PEOPLE LIKE REFLECTED GLORY.
The motives of sports owners are inscrutable, because sports don’t really make money, but let’s try to pin them down anyway. // The Footy Blog

 

YEAH, BUT CAN HE DO IT WHEN IT COUNTS? HUH?!? DON’T ANSWER THAT.
So Chicharito is good and stuff, showboats in warmups with a crazy bicycle goal. // CaughtOffside

 

LIKE AN ARMENIAN GOALKEEPER, WE’RE DOING THINGS OUTSIDE THE BOX. LIKE A LIVERPOOL GOALKEEPER, WE’RE A LITTLE BIT CRAZY.
Follow us on Twitter and Facebook so that KCKRS may bathe you in the warm waters of football culture…actually, we’ll provide the water, but I think we’ll hire someone to do the actual bathing. I hear Jack Warner is available.

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