QWK KCKS: Awkward Moments International

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Written By Chris Azzopardi

QWK KCKS is our way of helping you get your day started with a refreshing blast of football culture right in your face.

 

PHOTO: PARAGUAY IS CUTE.
Oscar Cardoza (bottom) and Hernan Perez celebrate a goal against Honduras by striking a pose. Demure. (REUTERS)

 

THE OCCAM’S RAZOR OF DERBY HATRED.
Football has rivalries. Here is why, in a handy cartoon format. // Surreal Football

 

STONER DOES EUROPE, HAS A KICK ASS JOB.
ESPN sideline dude Rob Stone chronicles his trip to Brussels for Grantland. America sucks, Europe rules. // Grantland

 

TYPOGRAPHY SHOULD NOT BE TAKEN LIGHTLY.
This isn’t the part of the female anatomy that Clint Dempsey’s first name usually invokes. Nice one, World Wide Leader…in making an “L” and an “I” look like a “U”. // Beat the First Man

 

PHOTO: DIETMAR, DO YOU HAVE SOMEWHERE YOU NEED TO BE?
Dietmar Constantini is getting impatient. How rude. We’ll be done in a bit, Dietmar. (REUTERS)

 

TODAY IN PRETTY RUSSIAN THINGS.
The plans for Spartak Moscow’s new stadium are pretty. Of course it will have plastic grass. // Stadium Porn

 

OF COURSE HE SHOVES IT ALL UNDER A HAT. I WOULD.
Carles Puyol, strolling about Rome with his WAG, looking like he just rolled off his bro’s futon. // Kickette

 

CESC FABREGAS, TRIPLE THREAT.
How this didn’t end with Arsene weeping softly in the corner, I have no idea. // Dirty Tackle

 

PHOTO: SO HAPPY TO SCORE, NUZZLING SEEMS AN APPROPRIATE RESPONSE.
Scotland’s Don Cowie feels the need to bury his nose in Steve Naismith’s neck after the latter scored against Lithuania yesterday. (REUTERS)

 

STOP THE COMPETITION. WE HAVE A WINNER.
Think of the worst penalty you have ever seen. Now imagine it way worse and with the player somehow falling down in the process. I bet you’re imagining something like this. // CaughtOffside

 

HERE’S AN IDEA PEOPLE WON’T LISTEN TO.
Perhaps the way to change Scottish football for the better is to introduce playoffs. Playoffs!?! Playoffs. // twofootedtackle

 

THIS IS ABOUT CHESS, BUT TRUST US.
Searching for a Bobby Fischer moment in soccer history sounds like a cool exercise. // The Other 87

 

PHOTO: THE KING IS THE THING.
Saudi Arabian fans hold up pictures of King Abdullah during their team’s match with Australia. (AP PHOTO)

 

NECESSITY IS THE MOTHER OF INVENTION. AND HASTILY SCRAWLED SHIRT NUMBERS.
Richard Dunne got a little blood on his jersey during Ireland’s match with Russia yesterday. A swap to a blank shirt meant Irish staff had to draw on his number. // Off the Post

 

HOW TO BE SUCCESSFUL IN BUSINESS AND ALIENATE YOUR FANS.
The regime of Mike Ashley at Newcastle is kinda like a dictatorship. A dictatorship with a business plan. // BleachRep

 

WE’LL MISS YOU, BOBBY.
American soccer lost a great one on Monday night when former MLSer and FC Dallas broadcaster Bobby Rhine tragically passed away at the age of 35. Rhine was the best of guys, a true lover of the game and part of the glue that holds the whole thing together. Bobby will be missed. On behalf of myself and KCKRS, we wish to express our condolences to his family. With a heavy heart, I’m passing along this link to a tribute to Bobby. // Soccer Insider

 

IT’S JUST A GAME. JUST. A. GAME.
The sad news doesn’t stop there, unfortunately. After a Wales fan died prior to the England-Wales Euro qualifier yesterday, it seems important to remind everyone that sport, and soccer in specifically are diversions, not life and death. Romanticize your passion however you wish, but remember that violence should have no place in the game. // The Guardian

 

IT’S A BEAUTIFUL GAME, BUT LIKE ANYTHING IN LIFE, IT SUCKS SOMETIMES.
Not that it’s all bad. There are lots of good things out there in the world of footy, and we will be bringing a few of them to you here at KCKRS throughout the day. So check us on Twitter, like us on Facebook, and slap a smile across that grill of yours. Things are looking up.

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