QWK KCKS: Evil Dominoes And Rubber Ducks

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Written By Chris Azzopardi

QWK KCKS is our way of helping you get your day started with a refreshing blast of football culture right in your face.

 

VIDEO: R.I.P. SOCRATES.
Brazilian legend Sócrates died at age 57. His former club, Corinthians, honored him before their match with Palameiras. (YouTube)

 

IT’S LIKE DOMINOES. EVIL ONES THAT BREAK HEARTS AND TRAMPLE HISTORY.
The current financial plight of Port Vale Football Club. It’s not good. // twohundredpercent

 

SOMEONE OUT THERE COLLECTS RUBBER DUCKIES IN TRADITIONAL GARB, YOU JUST KNOW IT.
Bayern Munich rubber bathrub-ready duck, complete with hat and lederhosen. If you don’t smile at this, I feel bad for you. // 500RTLF

 

ANDREI ALWAYS SMILES IMPISHLY. BECAUSE ANDREI IS DEFINITELY AN IMP.
The triumphant return of Andrei’s Arshavin’s Question Time. Or whatever he calls it. // Dirty Tackle

 

PHOTO: CALL ME.
Drogba is giving the international signal for “call me”, but Luiz actually looks like he’s talking into his hand. Uh, David… (Reuters)

 

TINO THROWS IN THE TOWEL.
One of Major League Soccer’s former teenage wunderkinds, a player that battled many demons over the years, has retired at the ripe old age of 27. // Soccer Insider

 

IT’S LIKE A DIEGO SHIRT PARADE!
A collection of photos of Diego Maradona in shirts of teams for which he never played. // Unpro Foul

 

IT’S GOOD TO KNOW BOJAN AND IBRA ARE ON BUTT-PINCHING TERMS. OR IT’S NOT.
It might say something about if you if you watch this gif more than once…oh, who am I kidding, it’s mesmerizing. Awkward big guy-little guy hug, for all the wins. // The Third Kit

 

PHOTO: DUDE, YOU TOTALLY HAVE HORSE BREATH.
Moenchengladbach’s Michael Hanke celebrates with the club’s giant horse mascot after drawing with Dortmund. (Reuters)

 

IS IT BAD WHEN A FAMOUS QUOTE FROM VIETNAM CAN APPLY TO WOMEN’S PRO SOCCER?
The best way to save women’s professional soccer is to let Women’s Professional Soccer die and start from scratch. // Pitch Invasion

 

OH NO. I MEAN BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA.
An unfortunately placed pitch-side microphone…cocked up a Thomas Cook advertisement for the television cameras. // Off the Pitch

 

TROLLERS GONNA TROLL.
Were you trolled by this piece on Messi at Soccernet this weekend? Did you spot the satire, unlike the 2,300 people who left comments? I’ll give you one guess who was responsible. // Surreal Football

 

PHOTO: CHAMPIONS GET TO WEAR AWESOME HATS. I WANT ONE.
Juan Roman Riquelme celebrated with the trophy and a kickass hat after Boca Juniors secured the Argentine title yesterday. (Reuters)

 

WE’RE JUST DOCUMENTING THE ENGLISH INVASION.
The podcast all the kids are talking about. Interviews with Phil Rawlins, English owner of Orlando City Soccer Club and Arlo White, English voice of soccer on NBC starting next year. // The Best Soccer Show

 

I HEAR TALKING TO STADIUMS MAKES THEM GROW FASTER.
The stadiums of Euro 2012, looking like so many blooming flowers (which is the theme, if you didn’t know). // Invent Football

 

SIMPLY NOTHING SADDER THAN AN IMPOTENT STAR. WHATEVER THAT IS.
Why John Mikel Obi is a shadow of what he could have been if he had chosen United over Chelsea. // Bleacher Report

 

PHOTO: ‘HANDS TO FACE’ IS THE INTERNATIONAL SIGNAL FOR ‘HOW DID I MISS THAT?’
Demba Ba, ruing a miss against Chelsea. (Reuters)

 

I’M OFF TO BUY A BAYERN DUCK FOR MY COLLECTION OF RUBBER DUCKS IN TRADITIONAL GARB. ANYONE KNOW WHERE I MIGHT FIND ONE WEARING A GAKTI?
Mondays are about survival, coffee, and avoiding actual human contact except with the people who give us our coffee. Grande triple latte with extra foam or whatever. Follow us on Twitter, like us on Facebook, keep your chin up and your eyes open. Ciao.

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