QWK KCKS: Guess Whose Back

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Written By Chris Azzopardi

QWK KCKS is our way of helping you get your day started with a refreshing blast of football culture right in your face.

 

PHOTO: IN THE SHADOW.
Gabonese kids play a pick up game in the shade of Libreville’s Central Omnisport stadium. (AP PHOTO)

 

MY TEETH ACHE JUST LOOKING AT IT.
Hey, look, it’s Poland’s under-construction national stadium as a chocolate treat. // A Football Report

 

CLINT’S NEW NICKNAME IS ‘RODNEY.’
Clint Dempsey definitely doesn’t get the respect he deserves. Now he’s linked to QPR. QPR? Really? // Sporting News

 

I THINK I HAVE AN UNNATURAL FASCINATION WITH FOOTBALL STAMPS.
In honor of the Africa Cup of Nations, it’s African soccer stamps. Wondermous. // Footysphere

 

VIDEO: HILARIOUS, BUT ONLY IF NO ONE GOT HURT.
Temporary barriers are dangerous, kids. I like how the commentator doing the highlights didn’t even mention the fans falling over. Oblivious. (YOUTUBE)

 

ANNIE WITH THE CHEEKY PARADINHA. I IMAGINE.
Little Orphan Annie scores a penalty on Bugs Bunny. Only in America. And only in the 1970s. // Beat the First Man

 

IN 20 YEARS, ALL FOOTBALL WILL BE PLAYED BY NEYMAR ROBOTS. IT’S THE ‘NEYMAR SINGULARITY.’
Santos created a display in the club museum to honor Neymar and his Puskas Award-winning goal that involves a tin man version of Neymar. I’m not sure this can ever be topped. // Dirty Tackle

 

FACT: 23% OF POLICE ACTIVITY IN GERMANY IS RELATED TO NAME-CALLING OF FOOTBALLERS. PROBABLY.
A truck driver called Lukas Podolski an “asshole”, so Lukas called the cops and filed charges. Don’t worry, he has witnesses. // Futbolita

 

PHOTO: THE BACK OF BOTSWANA.
The description for this photo says these Bostwana fans are “performing” before their team’s match with Ghana, but it sure looks like the old back-turn-disrespect move to me. (REUTERS)

 

THIS IS A LITTLE FLATTERING TO ‘ARRY. DID I SAY A LITTLE? I MEAN A GARGANTUAN AMOUNT.
You be the judge: does the artist’s rendering of Harry Redknapp at his tax evasion trial look anything like a certain English actor? // Off the Post

 

YOU KNEW THIS WAS COMING.
David Beckham’s planned Super Bowl ad is already engendering backlash from some of America’s thickest minds. // Ottawa Citizen

 

I BELIEVE THIS TO BE A LARGE AMOUNT OF MONEY, BUT I SHOULD PROBABLY CONSULT WITH AN ACCOUNTANT.
European clubs lost the equivalent of the gross domestic product of Armenia last year. // Bloomberg

 

PHOTO: UH, JURGEN? ARE YOU COACHING A SOCCER TEAM OR CHOREOGRAPHING A BROADWAY MUSICAL?
USMNT head coach Jurgen Klinsmann at training in Panama. I don’t even know. (REUTERS)

 

HEY! JACK WILSHERE IS JUST LIKE ME. I MEAN, WHAT? I DON’T SING USHER IN THE CAR. NOPE. NEVER.
Here’s video of Jack Wilshere singing along to Usher in the car because why wouldn’t you want to watch that? // The Original Winger

 

MLS COULD BE THE BEST LEAGUE IN THE WORLD IF IT WOULD JUST CHANGE EVERYTHING.
Sigh. // Bleacher Report

 

WE’VE AVOIDED MENTIONING TONIGHT’S EL CLASICOPA DEL REY SPECIFICALLY TO HELP AVOID BURNING YOU OUT ON IT. I DON’T THINK IT WORKED.
Follow us on Twitter and like us on Facebook and try not to get caught on camera singing in your car because someone is bound to put in on the internet and unless you’re Jack Wilshere or someone similarly cool and famous you’re probably going to be really, really embarrassed.

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