QWK KCKS: Introducing ‘Argentine Slap Fight’

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Written By Chris Azzopardi

QWK KCKS is our way of helping you get your day started with a refreshing blast of football culture right in your face.

 

PHOTO: DAVEY’S INDONESIAN FAN CLUB.
These girls really like David Beckham and want everyone to know it. (Getty Images)

 

THEY COULD HAVE CALLED IT THE ‘NEW CAMP NOU.’ HARDY HAR HAR.
Check out this psychedelic makeover that nearly happened at the Barca’s iconic stadium. 106,000 people might have been blinded for days at a time. // Stadium Porn

 

DIGITAL HAIR HELMETS, FTW.
Watch an 8-bit Carlos Alberto score against Italy in the 1970 World Cup because it’s mesmerizing. // NTMG

 

READING IS FOR CHUMPS. LOOK AT THESE PICTURES INSTEAD.
Illustrated match reports from questionable minds. I think this is art therapy or something. // Surreal Football

 

PHOTO: KEEPING AN EYE ON THE GALAXY.
An Indonesian soccer mom watches through binoculars as her kid takes part in a Galaxy-run clinic in Jakarta.

 

DO NOT CLICK IF YOU DON’T LIKE TO SEE TO CHILDREN IN PAIN. SO BASICALLY, NO ONE CLICK.
Lukas Poldoski’s car crash trouble didn’t seriously hurt anyone, but it did give a 1-year old a nasty shiner. He says he’ll make things right, but doesn’t like the “backlash.” Jeezus, Lukas. // Futbolita

 

NEW BAND NAME IDEA: ‘ARGENTINE SLAP FIGHT.’
Roma dressing room dustup involved verbal volleys (“This is not River”) and a…slap. Really guys, if you’re going to get suspended and fined, at least throw a real punch. // Football Italia

 

THAT TROPHY MAKES ME WONDER IF POSH IS THE FIFTH ELEMENT. GOD I HOPE NOT.
First rule of receiving a fashion award, apparently: no smiling. Or smiling, but in that pursed “I’m Victoria Beckham and I’m made out of steel” way. Icy. // Kickette

 

PHOTO: THIS IS IN INTERESTING CHOICE.
This Borussia Dortmund fan decided the perfect subject for his kick ass team tattoo was…manager Juergen Klopp. Ok then. (Reuters)

 

IT’S LIKE CANADIAN SOCCER CHRISTMAS OR SOMETHING. MAZEL TOV!
JDG2 (Jonathan De Guzman, little brother of Julian De Guzman, hence the “2″) might switch allegiances from Holland to his native Canada, per an interview with his big brother. Nothing is certain, but it’s kind of a big deal. // Canadian Soccer News

 

AT THE 45 SECOND MARK, HIS FACE NEARLY FELL COMPLETELY OFF.
The “I am so excited about scoring this penalty that I will now disappear down this staircase that is here behind the goal for some reason” celebration just doesn’t get enough play. // Dirty Tackle

 

THE GUY THAT DID THE SEATING CHART DESERVES A RAISE.
Cristiano Ronaldo and Atletico Madrid president Enrique Cerezo were seated at the same table at an awards banquet after CR7 picked up an ankle injury in Real Madrid’s match with Atleti. Did hilarity ensue? You betcha. // 101GG

 

PHOTO: AYYYYYYYYY.
Hey, look! David Villa is pointing at me. I must be awesome. (Reuters)

 

I WONDER WHAT THE CALLER ID SAYS WHEN THE PRESIDENT CALLS. I’M GUESSING ‘BAMF.’
President Obama gave Bruce Arena – who is in Indonesia with his traveling circus championship team – a call to congratulate the Galaxy on their MLS Cup title. // Major League Soccer Soccer

 

A LOT OF WORDS ABOUT A GAME THAT MATTERS ABOUT AS MUCH AS…WELL NOTHING
The Galaxy are playing an Indonesian Select side in Jakarta RIGHT NOW. Have a gander at the happenings, if you’re really super bored. // Bleacher Report

 

THE BEST THING ABOUT ARGENTINE SLAP FIGHT IS THAT WE’RE TOTALLY REDEFINING A GENRE. WE’RE JUST NOT SURE WHICH GENRE WE ARE YET.
Maybe like garage rock with a slick Latin vibe, or a rap group with real grimy beats. All I know is that our hairstyles are going to be ridiculous, and we’ll all be wearing Maradona jerseys. Rock on. Follow KCKRS, won’t you? Get on board the Facebook express. Later.

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