QWK KCKS: No Foolin’

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Written By Chris Azzopardi

QWK KCKS is our way of helping you get your day started with a refreshing blast of football culture right in your face.

 

PHOTO: FILED UNDER THINGS MORE IMPORTANT THAN FOOTBALL. GIVE IT UP FOR STAN.

Stiliyan Petrov, forced to retire after being diagnosed leukemia, gives a wave as the crowd acknowledges him at Villa Park. (GETTY IMAGES)

 

WHEN MARIO MET DRAKE AND THEY WHEN TO A DINER OR SOMETHING.

Every England-based footballer was tweeting about going to the Drake show last week, so it’s not really a surprise to see a photo of the Canadian rapper with Super Mario. // The Original Winger

 

SHOWING UP IN YOUR OWN BOAT IS THE DEFINITION OF BALLER.

When you’re as famous as Neymar, photos of you partying with the common folk is big news. // Futbolita

 

RIGHT NOW I WISH I KNEW THE WORD FOR ‘PLEASE’ IN DUTCH.

REPORT! Martin Jol is begging Clint Dempsey to sign a new contract at Fulham! // Sky Sports

 

PHOTO: THE MOST GRACEFUL INTER MANAGER SINCE RAFA. WAIT.

Andrea Stramaccioni made his debut as Inter manager on Saturday in a game that had four second-half penalties. Also, Andrew did the move above, which is quite fancy. (REUTERS)

 

WE’RE ALL LEFT TO WONDER: WHO WAS THAT BECAPPED BOY?

A boy comes off the sideline to make a goal-line save, scurries away. // Dirty Tackle

 

ARMED WITH NOTHING BUT THEIR TALENT AND THE WORD ‘QUOI.’

When Englishmen play in France, it’s noteworthy. Mostly because English players are homebodies. // IBWM

 

FEED YOUR INSATIABLE NEED FOR GOSSIP THAT YOU PRETEND YOU DON’T HAVE.

The weekend run down, including the only clever April’s Fools gag I’ve seen. // Kickette

 

PHOTO: ‘PLEASE WATCH OVER MISTER HARRY, AND LUKA AND ADE AND AND I’D LIKE A PONY FOR MY BIRTHDAY. AMEN.’

Garreth Bale appeals to a higher power after coming close against Swansea. (REUTERS)

 

AS IF YOU COULD POSSIBLY HAVE LOVED BIELSA ANY MORE.

Marcelo Bielsa is more than a tactical genius. He’s also a kind soul fostering community at Bilbao. // A Football Report

 

CHECK OUT THE KID WITH THE MASSIVE UPSIDE EVERYONE IS TALKING ABOUT.

Exclusive interview with German-American striker Terrence Boyd, the next big thing at striker (everyone hopes). // Bleacher Report

 

IF YOU FELL FOR ANY APRIL FOOLS’ GAGS YESTERDAY, I WANT YOU TO STOP WHAT YOU’RE DOING AND SLAP YOURSELF IN THE FACE. HARD.

It’s not that we’re not clever enough here at KCKRS to come up with a decent April Fools’ gag, it’s that we couldn’t be bothered. There are more important things on which to waste our brainpower. Like coming up with hilarious jokes about Andrey Arshavin and citrus. Follow and like away.

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