QWK KCKS: Please Keep Your Voices Down

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Written By Chris Azzopardi

QWK KCKS is our way of helping you get your day started with a refreshing blast of football culture right in your face.

 

AMERICA WONNED AT THE SUPER-IMPORTANT SOCCER GAME, YOU GUYS! GO US!

MLS is the champion of Europe now, because that’s how it works, right? (GETTY)

Morning, kids.

Last night, I saw someone asking on twitter what the point of the All-Star Game is. It comes in the middle of the season, disrupts the campaigns of the league’s most important players, and as we saw with Aurelien Collin, places key guys at risk for injury. And for what? At best, we look like rubes for celebrating a win against an uninterested team in its preseason. At worst, we get our asses kicked by an uninterested team in its preseason.

But the answer is simple: this whole All-Star process has been fun as heck. I mean, that’s why we do this, right? Because on some level, we really do enjoy 22 incredibly talented athletes kicking a polyurethane bladder around a bit of lawn. And in the days leading up to an event like this, I got to meet so many interesting and talented people in person that previously were just names and twitter photos and blog bylines to me. I also met up with friends that I only get to see once or twice a year, tops, and that’s always a lovely feeling.

And then there’s the free booze at the after-party, which I think I indulged in a little too freely. Keep the noise levels down please, because it feels like there is a family of disgruntled ferrets having a disagreement inside my brain.

LINKS! Ow. I mean, links…

 

WHAT A WASTE. HE’S CLEARLY MORE CUT OUT TO BE A WWE HEEL.

Mario Balotelli thinks he’d be a UFC fighter if he wasn’t a footballer. // Dirty Tackle

 

IT’S LESS OF A “CAREER ARC” AND MORE OF A “CAREER SINE WAVE.”

IBWM from earlier this week on Eddie Johnson’s resurrection, made all the more prescient by his All-Star Game-winner last night. // In Bed With Maradona

 

NORTH KOREA, SOUTH KOREA, IT’S NOT THAT MUCH OF A DIFFERENCE, IS IT?

Someone is going to get fired after putting the wrong Korean flag up at the Olympics. // Off The Post

PHOTO: JUST WAIT UNTIL THE MEN’S TOURNAMENT, WHEN KIM JONG UN SCORES 14 GOALS PER GAME AGAIN.

A DPRK fan demonstrates what an actual North Korean flag looks like. (AP PHOTO)

 

I’M COMPLETELY LOST. WHAT DOES ANYTHING MEAN ANYMORE?

Owen Coyle wore pants, which doesn’t happen often. // The Lion Of Vienna Suite

 

CHRIS PONTIUS: MVP OF THE ALL-STAR GAME, MVP OF KICKETTE READERS’ SEXY DREAMS.

Chris Pontius is a man of many talents. Chiefly, playing soccer and looking really ridiculously good while playing soccer. // Kickette

 

PHOTO: WELCOME TO THE CITY OF BROTHERLY LOVE, EVERYONE.

The MLS Media Cup was fun. I played against Jimmy Conrad (He was better. Just.) and took this. (INSTAGRAM)

 

THIS WEEK WAS CRAZY AS HELL YOU GUYS. I WISH I COULD REMEMBER MORE OF IT.

Seriously. The fun is what it’s all about. I really love my job when the days are like this. Help me keep it by following KCKRS and liking KCKRS and telling your friends about KCKRS.

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