QWK KCKS: The Dog Is Wagged

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Written By Chris Azzopardi

QWK KCKS is our way of helping you get your day started with a refreshing blast of football culture right in your face.

 

PHOTO: I’M USING THIS PHOTO AS A METAPHOR FOR SEPP PUSHING THROUGH GLT.

Heavy-handed, but so what. Sepp wags the football dog and gets to dole out a contract for GLT. And you can be sure some of that money will end up in his personal accounts. (REUTERS)

I GUESS IF YOU’RE GOING TO TRY TO BE LIKE ANYONE, TRY TO BE LIKE THE BEST.

Our friends at 101GG have discovered the SoCal U11 Barcelona-USA. Always worth a watch, even if the team’s coaches are overly combative and it hurts their message… // 101GG

 

BEWARE THE COMING OF SOUTH AMERICAN ZOMBIE SOCCER AS FORETOLD BY THE PROPHECY.

Emerson Sheik got away with some hand-biting in the Copa Lib final. Gather provisions, we’re headed for the hills. // Dirty Tackle

 

ICONIC MOMENTS, ALL OF THEM. AND THERE WILL NEVER BE ANOTHER LIKE THEM.

If the point of the game is to score a goal, you kinda have to get that part right. So GLT is good. But bringing it in means no more memories of moments like these. // The Independent

 

PHOTO: ONE IS AN AMAZING ATHLETE WITH OUT OF THIS WORLD TALENT. THE OTHER IS RONALDO.

I kid, I kid. Ronaldo as a footballer was a million times whatever Anderson Silva can be as a fighter. And Ronaldo is actually looking a little slimmer than the last time I saw him, so that’s good. (Getty Images)

 

BLOGGERS ARE PEOPLE WHO READ BORING SEC FILINGS SO YOU DON’T HAVE TO. IT’S THE BEST JOB EVER.

Manchester United is planning an IPO in the US. Among the risks listed is the “possible decline in the popularity of football.” Oh nos. // The Footy Blog

 

THE WORLD OF BLIND ITEM GOSSIP IS WEIRD. THIS IS POSTED WITHOUT FURTHER COMMENT.

Okay then. // Kickette

 

THE NATURAL QUESTION NOW IS ‘WHO SHOULD BE MORE OFFENDED?’

Metro news anonymously quotes the Twitter feed of an Everton fanzine, then called them “a disgruntled Liverpool fan.” Good one. // Off the Post

 

PHOTO: FINALLY, FOOTBALL ENTERS THE MODERN AGE. POWERPOINT FTW.

This is IFAB. I’m getting sleepy just looking at them. Oh, wait, is Jerome Valcke doing magic tricks? Okay, I’m awake. (Reuters)

FEEL THE RHYTHM, FEEL THE RHYME, GET ON UP, IT’S SOCCER TIME!

New Pumas, inspired by the nation with the fastest people in the world, Jamaica. // The Beautiful Gear

 

AWESOME RUMORS ARE AWESOME. FRANK IN LA + LANDON SELLING HOUSE = !!!!!

Frank Lampard took in an LA Galaxy game with the suspended David Beckham on Wednesday night. Clearly this means he’s signing. // Bleacher Report

 

IT’S JUST TOO DAMN HOT. I THINK I MIGHT BE CHANGING MY MIND ABOUT THE MLS CALENDAR.

MY FINGERS ARE SWEATING ON TO MY KEYBOARD. Argh. Follow and like KCKRS. I need to go sit in a refrigerator.

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